Tag Archives: change

Woops we are running late again … Well Wubble-u if for wishful thinking.

When all this started I may have been suffering from March Madness, the April challenge seemed a doddle, throw a few words together and hey there is a blog post. Not too difficult is it…. but then the W word became involved work, which I am grateful for, work which is paying the bills, work which has taken up 31 of the last 50 hours. So work is being blamed for my recent tardy posting in the April challenge, with only W, X, Y and Z to go I shall hope to be caught up by this time tomorrow and have only Z to post.  So with apologies for the delay here is my W for today.

I forget how many times I have heard the sigh of despair that is followed by the words “it’s wishful thinking” denoting the failure of hopes or the disappointment at the outcome of a situation. So things didn’t work out, plans flopped outcomes were not as hoped. When I hear that sigh I want to stand up and shout a bit… “So keep wishing”, keep looking for the best and become the change that you want. For it is up to the individual to put wishful thinking into place. Working with challenging behaviours, be it with children, adults or perhaps even the odd work college (in the past) operating on optimum positivity can be hard, but when my grin factor fades and the challenge becomes a chore I know I am on  a hiding to nothing. It is then more than ever that I need to sit and think – it is time for wishful thinking.

Some time ago, I worked with a person who had a personality that tended to clash with mine; lets call him Mr Difficult. I was consumed by the negative aura that he omitted as soon as  he entered the building, it affected everyone. The service users behaviours would change and it was a chain reaction that led to many difficulties that I cannot disclose. There was not option, I was either going to have to change jobs or change my daytime routine, the latter was easier.

Mornings were the worst, so instead of turning up with the minimum amount of time to spare getting in and out as quickly as possible I got in early. I made Mr Difficult a cup of tea, checked the task list for the day and prepared as much as I could. Mr Difficult also came in early (but I beat him in), I greeted him with a smile and a cheerful hello, confused he responded in a curt but polite manner we did not converse but worked in silence. That day was better.

When I got home that night, I wondered if the change was “wishful thinking” I sat and listed all the things that had perturbed me in the previous weeks and wondered how I could change them, IF I could change them. I chose three things that could be altered to benefit us all and sent a polite email. Mr Difficult did not reply before I left for work the next day, but while I waited for his response I continued to smile and be cheerful. Over the next week if I was on days I would make us both a cup of tea, write lists to do and work quietly waiting for something to be said slowly changing displays and work areas.

Two weeks after I had emailed Mr Difficult, I walked into to work on a Monday morning to find a cup of tea waiting for me, “Morning” was called out from the store cupboard Mr Difficult had it seemed succumbed to the wishful thinking. Things were never easy between us, as colleges we both knew that we were perhaps too similar, to stubborn  but while we never became friends once we had both embraced wishful thinking we were able to make a difference to the team.

Todays wishful thinking is that I will complete this A to Z … so from a little Miss (not quite so) Difficult, Today I am grateful for wishful thinking, for hopes and dreams for time to ponder on how we can improve things and for becoming the difference we want to see.

C …. Changed my mind ? Can’t I just drink coffee?

a-to-z-letters-cSome crazy lady (I use that term loosely) convinced herself that committing to this A to Z challenge would be a grand idea, completing this cerebral-meltdown by choosing a theme of gratitude by letters, and starting a new job on day three of the challenge. Could anyone be so barmy?
On yes that was me!

Could I just skip C an D and rejoin at E? (My second 12 hour shift is tomorrow) That does kind of defeat the object doesn’t it and besides there has been substantial speculation regarding the C of choice from one friend so I feel obliged to continue. My comic chum did suggest perhaps I should post on “constipation” I will pass on giving thanks for concrete-crap just this once.
Changing the subject, to chocolate, no cheese, perhaps cooking? Changes… I wish I could be grateful for changes. Like many people, when the new normal is established I am often surprised pleased with the results but that interim period when things are altering often scares the pants off me. Even if the results are not what we may have hoped there are lessons to be learnt from changing situations.

Can you imagine a life without change? We would soon fester. Caught in a stagnant pond, drowning slowly in a sea of the same old … I could not be thankful for that prospect. So I am pleased and accepting of change. At times I wish I could control it, command it, I cannot. Conceding that it is needed and preparing for the changes that occur may at times be the only available option.

Today, things changed for me. I am pleased they did. My head is swimming with information; colleagues’ names, residents’ names, care-plans, the list is endless. I came home after the longest of days, almost 13 hours on my feet. I have walked miles. After that, despite great contemplation, the appreciation for the changes pales into insignificance when compared to my current gratitude for coffee and comfortable shoes!

The B List

The B List….


It was approaching three years ago when I was packing my belongings and headed to Weston Super Mare. The plan was simple to build a new life for me and my boy near my family. A flat was found, the deposit paid, so I said my goodbyes to friends in Poole and hopped on a train pointing northwest-ish to start my new adventure. On this train I penned the B-List! It was a simple list of hopes and dreams aspirations that I would endeavour to fulfil. As time passed that work and commitments outside the home relegated that insignificant piece of paper to a drawer… till now.


The B list.

1. To Cook from scratch, good food simple ingredients grown myself / sourced locally.

2. To be creative, to write and think and make.

3. To make sure in my working life I make a difference- to find worth in the work I do.

4. To walk, to see and to feel the seasons as they pass.

5. Get a bike, one with a basket would be good.

6. Embrace the community that I find.

7. Recycle, reuse see the worth and potential.

8. Make sure above all else I laugh each day, but never at someone else’s expense.


In the last three years, I have taken steps to fulfil some of these hopes, I do try to cook, but I do not have a vegetable patch or even a herb garden. Financial obligations seemed to override the simplest of ambitions and I found I sold my sole to pay the rent worked for a pressure sales company and lost track of what my self had sought. So for a long time my day job did not have that positive impact that I had hoped, indeed it began to suffocate me. With my faithful hound I walk often I see the changes that are surrounding us, feel the warmer rain as summer approaches and yes I now have a bike. To cycle in the centre of any urban landscape is it’s self an education and roundabouts, they are just scary.


 So as I look down this list I come to the community, it is a funny word, once associated with villages, or areas of town, the locale. Yet now we have the Polish community, the Gay community, the Black community, the religious community of whichever doctrine you choose, the list goes on and seems to separate groups from the larger environment placing them in a niche that defines them as different from those around them. That separation was not what I sought. Yet a collective a true community in the sense that I had hoped was located and so I began work as a barmaid and so to laugh, we cannot laugh all the time, life is a serious business (so I am told) and to be fair I do cry sometimes too.


Current assessment of the B list!


1. Not successful but attempted when possible … no garden allotment etc (fail?)

2. To be creative, yes I write and recent loss of day job has given me more time to make (recovering from fail)

3. 2.5 years with the hell-centre, sorry call centre, followed by a stint drowning in complaint processing… new job to be started (recovering from fail)

4. Oh yes big fat tick on this one !

5. It took nearly 3 years but I have one and I ride it ! tick

6. Tick and tick again

7. I think I can also tick here.

8 and another tick…

Yet here I sit, lap top at the ready… and what do I think, well it is time to live the B list, blog and laugh along the way.