When all this started I may have been suffering from March Madness, the April challenge seemed a doddle, throw a few words together and hey there is a blog post. Not too difficult is it…. but then the W word became involved work, which I am grateful for, work which is paying the bills, work which has taken up 31 of the last 50 hours. So work is being blamed for my recent tardy posting in the April challenge, with only W, X, Y and Z to go I shall hope to be caught up by this time tomorrow and have only Z to post. So with apologies for the delay here is my W for today.
I forget how many times I have heard the sigh of despair that is followed by the words “it’s wishful thinking” denoting the failure of hopes or the disappointment at the outcome of a situation. So things didn’t work out, plans flopped outcomes were not as hoped. When I hear that sigh I want to stand up and shout a bit… “So keep wishing”, keep looking for the best and become the change that you want. For it is up to the individual to put wishful thinking into place. Working with challenging behaviours, be it with children, adults or perhaps even the odd work college (in the past) operating on optimum positivity can be hard, but when my grin factor fades and the challenge becomes a chore I know I am on a hiding to nothing. It is then more than ever that I need to sit and think – it is time for wishful thinking.
Some time ago, I worked with a person who had a personality that tended to clash with mine; lets call him Mr Difficult. I was consumed by the negative aura that he omitted as soon as he entered the building, it affected everyone. The service users behaviours would change and it was a chain reaction that led to many difficulties that I cannot disclose. There was not option, I was either going to have to change jobs or change my daytime routine, the latter was easier.
Mornings were the worst, so instead of turning up with the minimum amount of time to spare getting in and out as quickly as possible I got in early. I made Mr Difficult a cup of tea, checked the task list for the day and prepared as much as I could. Mr Difficult also came in early (but I beat him in), I greeted him with a smile and a cheerful hello, confused he responded in a curt but polite manner we did not converse but worked in silence. That day was better.
When I got home that night, I wondered if the change was “wishful thinking” I sat and listed all the things that had perturbed me in the previous weeks and wondered how I could change them, IF I could change them. I chose three things that could be altered to benefit us all and sent a polite email. Mr Difficult did not reply before I left for work the next day, but while I waited for his response I continued to smile and be cheerful. Over the next week if I was on days I would make us both a cup of tea, write lists to do and work quietly waiting for something to be said slowly changing displays and work areas.
Two weeks after I had emailed Mr Difficult, I walked into to work on a Monday morning to find a cup of tea waiting for me, “Morning” was called out from the store cupboard Mr Difficult had it seemed succumbed to the wishful thinking. Things were never easy between us, as colleges we both knew that we were perhaps too similar, to stubborn but while we never became friends once we had both embraced wishful thinking we were able to make a difference to the team.
Todays wishful thinking is that I will complete this A to Z … so from a little Miss (not quite so) Difficult, Today I am grateful for wishful thinking, for hopes and dreams for time to ponder on how we can improve things and for becoming the difference we want to see.